Sunday, July 11, 2010

Just Be

It was one of those weeks, I would say one of those months were I just needed to get away. So I did. I spent the weekend in what I call paradise aka Playa Bonita in Las Terrenas. Sounds familiar? Well it should because I went there back in October with a friend who was visiting from the States and I took some pictures, which I shared. Although I never physically went back, my spirit and mind visited often, as I found peace and serenity there. I went by myself and had a perfect weekend, well minus the inopportune headache and the every so often bug bit because of course I forgot the bug repellent.

I absolutely loved being there alone; however, I have to admit that the first few hours were a bit tough. I imagined what it would be like if some of the people I loved could share the beautiful tranquility with me. I then allowed myself to naturally refocus on my being there. I allowed myself to just be!

I stayed at this little simple hotel on the beach called Coyamar. No ACs there, no room service, none of that, just wonderful people who put a smile on my face. It was unbelievable I was there nine months ago and they all remembered me including the Motoconcho guy (motorcycle driver/taxis). Although I went there wanting to be alone, it was good to see some familiar faces that acknowledged me and then let me just be.

Now let’s be realistic, I didn’t expect to spend a day and a night at the beach and have my anxieties, confusions, all of it just magically disappear. Nonetheless, being there alone and surrounded by my definition of beauty and by clean air (yes people, the pure air has a lot to do with it, the pollution in Santo Domingo is getting to me!), allowed me to think clearer and to relax. Now, I didn’t leave Las Terrenas with the answer to my problems, but I left there feeling like the answers will come.

What I learned this weekend: Trust your body, trust your soul. If it wants to get away let it. Now, I understand that not everyone has a Playa Bonita just a few hours away, but you must find that place that makes you feel at peace. It can be a room in your house, the library, a store, the park, really anywhere. 

Thursday, July 8, 2010

"If the world were merely seductive, that would be easy. If it were merely challenging, that would be no problem. But I arise in the morning torn between a desire to save the world and a desire to savor the world. This makes it hard to plan the day." E.B. White

Diez meses despues...

Ten months later and although some things continue to excite me, I have to admit that the romanticism is over. Well at least most of it. I am here living a kind of 9-5 life, the only difference is that I have the amazing ocean surrounding me and the sweet and juicy tropical fruits that are no longer a rarity but an everyday thing. I can remember my first few nights here, actually the first few months I would say, I was completely astonished at everything I saw. I was in awe at all of the cultural difference that I saw and related to. I finally understood, after 18 years, where certain words came from and why Dominicans did certain things. Now the romance is gone. I don’t necessarily think is a bad thing that some things seem normal to me, but it’s certainly not as fun.

This morning I woke up all confused, which is very normal for me. I was a little homesick, ok maybe a lot homesick and for some reason I was particularly missing New York City, one of my favorite places in the world. Then I began to think about all of the aspects of a city that I missed from Boston and thought, but I have a city down the street from me, what’s wrong with me!

Well let me break it down for those of you who don’t know. Santo Domingo is a city, it has many franchises similar to those in the US, it has some tall building which are mostly for residential purposes, it has tons of people, I believe 3 million to be exact, heck it even has a metro system, well not quite the system yet because there is one line, but you get my drift. Now why am I not satisfy with this particular city you might ask. It’s actually quite simple, the Zona Alta, as the city like part of the city is called is composed of a lot of middle class/rich white Dominicans. There is no diversity like there is in NYC or in any other major cities of the world.  There is no little Italy, or little India or believe or not there is no Washington Heights. I live in the old part of the city la Zona Colonial. Here you will find a bunch of really cool colonial looking homes and tons of tourism, but it has some character and personality, something that in my opinion you will not find in the city part of the city.

It’s funny though. I have all these crazy ideas of things that I would like to do here, I don’t know why I haven’t started. I was thinking about it this morning, could it be fear of failing, I don’t think so because I have the mentality that in case I do fail, I just keep it moving. I guess real life is stopping me, or at least what I’ve been socialized to think of as real life, don’t act like you don’t know what I am talking about, going back to school, eventually marrying and having children with someone etc. Come to think about it, in the end it’s just fear. 

Monday, July 5, 2010

I'm here..

When I leave this place, I really take a long time to come back. I use to think that I can do it all, work full time, manage three blogs, take care of my home, and of course last but certainly not least, take good care of my self. You want the truth, it’s not happening. I have to stop beating myself up for not being able to always do it all and to think that I am not even a mom, a wife, nor a PhD student yet! Instead of concentrating on the fact that I’ve been absent all these weeks, lets take a moment to talk about some of the amazing things that happened during this time…